Trekkers of the World Unite.

[A brief history of geekdom.]

To the layperson, geeks appear to be the same. Upon closer inspection, you will notice that geeks can be classified into distinct genera. There are sci-fi geeks, fantasy geeks, comic book geeks, anime geeks, and the original chicken-head-biting geeks. I proudly affliate myself with the sci-fi geeks, and have been trying to co-ordinate a plot to eradicate the anime geeks... but that's another blog altogether.

[A brief history of sci-fi geeks.]

Within the sci-fi genre, there are two main geek classes which are have managed to subvert the weaker groups. These two classes are the Star Trek geeks (Trekkers) and the Star Wars geeks (Star Warriors?). These two groups are currently locked in a fierce battle for sci-fi geek supremacy. If you think this is silly, I agree. Both groups should obviously be working together to destroy the anime geeks instead.

[Star Trek vs. Star Wars]

I proudly align myself with the Star Trek geeks, and I enjoy watching those pathetic month long line-ups before Star Wars: Episode I and II. Their sad devotion to that dying franchise has not helped them conjure up a decent movie plotline. I now ask all Star Trek geeks to visit their local theatres and openly MOCK the Star Wars fans. If you must dress up as a Klingon to do this, so be it.

[Set phasers on humiliate.]

You see, Star Trek fans can watch their shows on TV in the comfort of their own homes. Star Wars fans have to drag their sorry asses to the movie theatre and throw away their money. Let's be honest here... there have only been 3 good Star Wars movies. ONLY THREE GOOD STAR WARS MOVIES! That's supposed to compete with the Star Trek franchise, with more than 3 good movies and a whole bunch of great television seasons? Illogical. Completely illogical!!!

So remember: Go out there and shame a Star Wars fans. Shame them good, because we really must deter this kind of behaviour. If you wander across runty pasty geeks dressed up as wookies or Darth Vaders make sure you remind them how very very sad their life has become.