I was going to post a blog about this earlier, but I wanted to wait for the confirmation results to come in first. This year's Tour De France winner, Floyd Landis, has tested positive for synthetic testosterone. It's common knowledge that testosterone is a hormone that increases muscle development and endurance. In addition to this, I've also been told that if you artificially increase your testosterone levels, your body's natural testosterone-producing organs begin to get smaller to compensate... in other words, your testicles shrink! Hehe...
Shrinking testicles aside, I hate cheaters, and the idea of athletes using performance-enhancing drugs disgusts me. (Refer to this for details.) Unfortunately, I must concede to reality, and reality tells me that the days of "organic athletes" are numbered. Drug use is becoming so rampant that it's become part of the sport. Athletes can either spend months or years on intense training, or they can use performance enhancing drugs and achieve the same results in a fraction of the time.
Be sure to watch next year when I win the Tour De France. I will complete the Tour De France, barely finishing the first stage. I will then stage an amazing comeback by completing the rest of the Tour in a Toyota Yaris. At the finish line, I will wear the yellow jersey proudly because I will know that my victory was a triumph of personal achievement.
Shrinking testicles aside, I hate cheaters, and the idea of athletes using performance-enhancing drugs disgusts me. (Refer to this for details.) Unfortunately, I must concede to reality, and reality tells me that the days of "organic athletes" are numbered. Drug use is becoming so rampant that it's become part of the sport. Athletes can either spend months or years on intense training, or they can use performance enhancing drugs and achieve the same results in a fraction of the time.
Be sure to watch next year when I win the Tour De France. I will complete the Tour De France, barely finishing the first stage. I will then stage an amazing comeback by completing the rest of the Tour in a Toyota Yaris. At the finish line, I will wear the yellow jersey proudly because I will know that my victory was a triumph of personal achievement.
3 comments:
I am blasé about a positive drug test for Floyd Landis because I always figured that the Tour De France was impossible to finish without drugs.
Anyways, if performance enhancing drugs are truly rampant in competitive cycling, doesn't that mean Landis is competing on an equal playing level?
I've been an advocate of splitting up sports into drugged-up and non-drugged-up categories. There should be a baseball league with organic athletes, and a baseball league for steroid fiends. People have their choice of watching both, and I suspect that the steroid fiends will win out in ratings.
drugs for everyone!
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