It's a Mad Max world!

Congratulations are in order! Simon and Jean are parents to a bouncing baby boy! As mentioned previously, I would help train Maxwell "Mad Max" Carr for survival in the post-apocalyptic world. For now, young Maxwell will enjoy a simple life of baby drool, diapers, and breast milk. But it won't be long before he has to learn how to fight off bands of gasoline-starved bandits in leather, or militant cyborgs from the future, or flesh hungry morlocks... The world is going to be a dangerous place.

As I see it, Max is too young to handle shotguns and chainsaws. It would be safer to start him off with more basic tools, like spears, clubs, and possibly throwing knives if he progresses well. This would be complemented with a regiment of martial arts training such as Jujitsu and/or Thai kickboxing. Survival training can be thrown into the mix on weekends, just to add variety. Urban survival can be taught during the summer months, and wilderness survival can be taught in the winter months.

This is all preliminary stuff though. Once young Max has mastered post-apocalyptic preschool, we'll start introducing more challenging activities:

• Memorization of "The Art of War"
• Wrestling and taming various types of wild bears
• Constructing and maintaining an ornithopter
• Grenades: Fragmentation, flash-bang, or EMP?
• Guerilla warfare tactics
• Blind sword fighting
• Basic primer to psionic warfare
• Robotics engineering
• Zero-gravity combat training
  
• The complexities of time travel paradox theory

It's not easy preparing a child for the future.